Tonight is the night before the second Canadian medical board exam that I must write, the MCCQE1. I passed the MCCEE some time ago, but it was significantly easier (supposedly) than this test. I have, however, prepared more extensively (supposedly) for this test. My diet and exercise regimes have suffered greatly these past few months; many samosas were consumed today, and much He-Man (2002, not the original) was watched in an effort to relax the mind before tomorrow's board exam.
I stopped reading hours ago, out of fatigue and acceptance that whatever happens shall happen and any additional review I undertake today will make little difference if any to my score. After tomorrow, I shall be free to do as I wish (vacuuming and preparing for Europe and residency) until June 10th, the unofficial first day of my residency. At that time, this blog shall change from themed articles to dated journal entries. Actually, there will be many dated journal entries in Europe, I feel that would be most appropriate in order to best record my travels there.
There are habits about my life I wish to change, and I shall begin tomorrow to perform them no more. My body aches from overuse through bad posture and I shall correct it. My energy is low from an imbalance of nutrients and I shall correct it. My will has been bent over from anxiety, and that shall be the first thing corrected. In the book "Dune", the difference between a human and an animal is elegantly described. An animal, when caught in a trap, cries out from the pain. A human, when caught in the same trap, waits quietly for whomsoever laid the trap to return, so that they may be killed and so that no other human shall be harmed as a result of the trap. If I am to better myself, I must endure the weaknesses and the pain my own mind causes me, that I may live longer and healthier in order to serve those in need of my help. I have the odd moments of clarity.
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